Passion

In case you missed it, I love weddings.

Okay, sarcasm aside, I don’t just love them; it’s something I’m genuinely passionate about. I remember picking up my first wedding magazine (yes, I still own it). I. was. hooked. For a long time I knew I wanted to work in the wedding industry, I just didn’t know to what capacity. Cake baker, florist, dress consultant, for a [very] short time I considered working with a planning business.

Then the light went on and I put two of my favorite things together and it clicked; I realized I wanted to write for a wedding magazine. It’s been a winding road since that revelation, full of doubts, questions. For a time last year, I thought God was calling me to full-time ministry and I seriously struggled to make sense of what I felt I was born to do and what I thought God was calling me to. Last April through June, I participated in a reading course with Youth With a Mission in Lakeside, Montana. During the first several weeks of this school, the Lord constantly flooded me with pictures, verses, and words from others describing promises of fruition over my dreams. It’s been just shy of a year since that all began and I’m not a whole lot closer to getting back to New York and starting to write for a particular wedding publication downtown. But He opened up the door for a sweet and rad internship with Jay & Jess that I LOVE. This has been a step in the right direction and it has been such a wonderful blessing of confirmation that this was what I was made to do and where my passion lies.

But it’s also been tough waiting patiently (and sometimes not-so patiently) for the Lord to open doors towards my passion as a full-time career. Recently I felt like He gave me this section in Ecclesiastes 3:9-11,

What do workers gain from their toil? I have seen the burden God has laid on the human race. He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.”

If you know me well, you’ll know I spent the following moments crying as I processed this verse. Sometimes the Lord gives us passions and we have to wait a long time till we see the result of those passions. Sometimes we have to wait and work a lot before we see any fruit hanging off of that tree. I often reflect on the story of Abraham and Sarah. They waited twenty-five years from the time of the Lord’s promise to His fruition for their son, Isaac. I wonder the way Abraham and Sarah felt the first time they held their long-awaited son. I wonder how much joy Sarah felt when she felt her baby leap in her womb. I think about my future and the promises the Lord has given me, and I hold on tightly, for the Lord is faithful to do as He has promised. 

It may take years, but the promises of the Lord do not come back empty, and on this truth I stand. These passions we have, they’re not for nothing. They’re not pointless. So if you’re just joining us on the Waiting Subway (like my subtle NY reference?) or if you’ve ridden it around for years, you’re not alone. I’m not alone.

Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill His promises to her.” -Luke 1:45.

Let’s hang on to this in the midst of angst, anxiety, or anger.

Passion